I don’t believe in creating a bucket list. For one, it’s a list of things a person is supposed to be doing before he/she dies. It’s vague for me how a bucket list works (is it mandatory or optional? how do you finance it?)
Since I’ve spent most of my adult life with a day planner (or a daily to-do list), a bucket list should be second nature for me. But, no. I cannot have my life’s goals depend on a LIST. A list is simply not enough. I need details, bullet points, lists within lists within a list. I need a point of reference, commencement and culmination dates. I need financial mapping, where to get money from and where to spend it on (consider monetary logistics, because money is a good gauge of whether or not I can push something through). OCD aside, I need my life’s goals to be laid out in a manner I can work with and work on.
Yes, sometimes my head is so far down my ass I see wonderful things in all its glorious tightness. But after
fucking messing up so many times, I think people will understand if I have developed a natural disinclination to allow things to fall apart. So, I control what I can. But it’s a depressing fact of life that some things are ever so naturally beyond my control (hence, I practice yoga asanas and meditation).
So anyway… Since I started practicing yoga about a year ago, I’ve built my life around a premise that in whatever I do, it must have some sort of benefit to my body, my environment, my economy. OKay, so that’s another gauge. I’m not making any coherent sense, but allow me to ramble on…
I remember in college when I told myself I’d turn vegetarian by age 25. I never actually meant it then. But now that I’m a mere 6 months away from the silver age, it’s starting to make more sense. I better put more thought to this. And more greens.
And other rants
- Pet peeve: uncertainty in all its forms and inconveniences. Had a recent run in with this. I try not to dwell on it. I try. I do.
- Yoga: Not really a rant but I’ve been making great progress, using my old stiff self as basis of comparison. Got a new Manduka Pro Drift mat. Slippery when new, awesome when (forcefully) broken in.
- Income: I need more. I’m not lazy. But I just need to divert my attention to income generating activities. Gotta pay the bills somehow. Hmmmn.
- Love: I love India. What can I say. I haven’t been to, but my idea of a spiritual pilgrimage is to spend at least a month in an ashram in Rishikesh, Uttarkhand. Wake up and smell the curry! I want to eat, pray,
- I’m in dire need of cohesion. Seriously.